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El Clasico Afterparty: Xerez 0 – 2 Barcelona
A success! Triumph! Complete obliteration of the enemy! Victory has been snatched from the jaws of hair gel and unnatural tan skin. Hail the all mighty laser pointer! Lynch pin of a master class results! The Cant del Barça rung around the stadium as those expensive boys from Real Madrid ...
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Liveblog: Barcelona @ Xerez
Join us in discussion as our men take on Xerez in La Liga for Match day 13. AS per usual, we’ll be kicking off proceedings approx 20 minutes before the game starts. Barcelona @ Xerez
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Leo Messi’s Golden Ball (and other things you didn’t already know)
I assume most of our readership is not living in caves, away from all human contact, and that they already know (because they’ve seen it here , here or even here ) that our very own Lionel Messi has walked off with France Football’s 2009 Ballon D’Or with a sweeping 473 out of ...
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Messi Wins Ballon D’Or (and other things you didn’t already know)
I assume most of our readership is not living in caves, away from all human contact, and that they already know (because they’ve seen it here , here or even here ) that our very own Lionel Messi has walked off with France Football’s 2009 Ballon D’Or with a sweeping 473 out of ...
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Barcelona 1, Real Madrid 0 (What could have been)
This game did not live up to its billing. I mean sure, both teams finished with 10 men. Sure, Zlatan finished the Alves cross by almost blowing the net off the post. Sure Messi was all over the place, looking lively and embarrassing defenders all over the place. Sure, Lolando and company ...
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Xavi speaks out before the Clásico: “Real Madrid has a lot of nerve”
Ha! You thought I’d let you have a quiet, relaxing morning before the Clásico ? You were wrong! This morning, Spanish newspaper El País published a long, engaging interview with our very own Xavi Hernández , in preparation for the Clásico . Sit back and enjoy as Xavi speaks about ...
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I leave you with this
In preparation for the game of the year tomorrow, let us joyfully sing together the anthem of the greatest football team on planet Earth. Tot el camp és un clam som la gent blaugrana Tant se val d’on venim si del sud o del nord ara estem d’acord, ara estem ...
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FC Barcelona vs. Real Madrid Preview Part I: The Art of Stretching Two Hours of Football Into a Whole Week.
FC Barcelona vs. Real Madrid Preview Part I: The Art of Stretching Two Hours of Football Into a ...
barcelona.theoffside.com — So, here we are at that time of the year where one single event tends to consume... everything, from thought to printing paper to money and especially fingernails. It takes a long time and a lot of friction to cultivate such an atmosphere that paralyzes ... (more) FC Barcelona vs. Real Madrid Preview Part I: The Art of ...
Barcelona 2, Inter-Milan 0 This is how we do it
An imperious performance by our men in Blaugrana today saw some vivacious attacking football that had Inter on their heels all evening long. Some good saves by Julio Cesar prevented by what all accounts (save the score line) was a rout. A singular tense moment in the first half, caused by ...
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Barcelona Against Inter and all odds! A.K.A. Dancing in a minefield!
barcelona.theoffside.com — Can we exchange our shirts after the game? “Inter Milan will park the bus against Barcelona. It... won’t be a surprise tomorrow at the Camp Nou, after they played a passive defensive game at home, in Italy. Mourinho is seeking a draw, and he may get ... (more) Barcelona Against Inter and all odds! A.K.A. Dancing in ...
Out of Trouble and in to the Deep End, Athletic 1 – 1 Barcelona
As Manuel Enrique Mejuto González blew his whistle full stop to signal the end of the match and the beginning of the mass procession out of San Mames, Josep Guardiola and Tito Vilanova paused to consider the crux of the situation. They’d just witness their team perform adequately ...
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Liveblog: FC Barcelona @ Athletic Bilbao
Come join us as we take on Athletic Bilbao! The stream will start up approx 20 min before the match, so come on in and enjoy this time with us! FC Barcelona @ Athletic Bilbao
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Barcelona @ Atheltic Bilbao Preview: Cooking Lions With Chef Guardiola
Well, we’re stuck in it now, aren’t we? With the quickest of glances at the upcoming schedule, you’d reckon that Pep, Tito and Co. will have to sharpen their knives and put on their cowboy boots for what’s about to happen. You see, they don’t just hand out stadium nicknames like bits of corn ...
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Barça players and the International Break: this time we swear in French
So this is it, boys and girls, the end of international break. Let’s hear that sigh of relief and the raucous celebrations because (with the exception of Touré and Keita leaving for the African Cup), our boys are home to stay until the next year at least. And what did this day of friendlies ...
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A quick query on the renewal of a certain Mexican’s contract.
An old Mexican man, worn from years of work and the testing weight of life, once told me as I stood in (for the night) the oddly contemplative McDonalds, waiting for possibly the most time-consuming six pack of McNuggets I’d ever ordered: “The broken man comes back strong and ...
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Barça players and the International Break: Spain, Argentina and the meaning of ‘friendly’
So, yesterday was the first day of friendlies, World Cup qualifiers and playoffs of this maligned international break, and those of our boys who had been called up by their respective NTs were in the thick of things, as usual (except for Chygrynskiy , who didn’t play in the match that Ukraine ...
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FC Barcelona 5, Cultural Leonesa 0, a.k.a. “We feel pretty!”
Forgive any typos you might find in this post, as I find that typing whilst bouncing gleefully on your seat and humming “Tot el camp” is not conductive to good spelling. Yesterday’s was one of those pretty, gleeful matches that culés (and football aficionados everywhere) can only sit back and ...
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FC Barcelona vs Cultural Leonesa: how to play in the midst of a stampede. An international stampede.
Yes, that’s a bit of an exaggeration. FC Barcelona players have way too much class to trample anyone in their rush to leave for international pastures. I assume they will politely excuse themselves before leaving, but the point remains that someone is going to actually go on the pitch to defend ...
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Review: Barcelona’s lethargy, Mallorca’s misfortune, and how Ibrahimovic is “Il Magnifico”
A solitary flag, claret and blue, stands where two lines meet. When it comes to Barcelona, a few keywords are in constant rotation: possession, eminence, Lionel Messi, brilliant, short (and yet the likes of Piqué, Chygrynskiy, Touré, Busquets, and Ibrahimovic tower over most), tiki-taka, ...
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La Liga Preview: FC Barcelona vs Real Mallorca
Even thought everyone seems to have forgotten in the face of the catastrophe that is our coming to a draw in our last two matches, we have an important match to play on Saturday. We need to re-establish our superiority over the whole wide world after having stumbled over Osasuna and Rubin Kazan ...
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